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Hey, girl, hey!

aleyarion.com is a digital diary, documenting the many life lessons & stories ranging from love, career struggles, pop culture and interviews from Aley told through a witty and relatable lens. Walk with me.

Why Shooting Your Shot Isn't as Scary As You Think

Why Shooting Your Shot Isn't as Scary As You Think

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Michael. Lebron. Steph.  Melo. They all have one thing in common: night after night, season after season, they spend endless hours crafting the perfect moves to land the perfect shot. In fact, they’ve made an entire career out of it.

But when it comes to us regular folk, we tend to take shots of a different form. Whether that be applying for our dream job, starting our own business, or finding "the one".

That’s what I did.... or tried to do. After almost a half decade, I finally mustered up the confidence necessary to tell the young man of my dreams just how I felt.

This is what happened.


About a month ago, I found myself scrolling through my Twitter when I stumbled upon the following thread.

https://twitter.com/carrieebbyy/status/808095080313712641

Annnddd this:

https://twitter.com/_parisl0ve/status/808387949297618944

Now, as a believer in signs & wonders, I took the above evidence as a hint from God to accomplish a goal that had been placed in my heart way back in 2011.

I committed: Back when I was in undergrad, I was cute but I didn’t necessarily feel cute-cute; especially the summer I first met him. He was the typical tall, dark, and handsome fella with crazy amazing style that my Midwest born, southern raised self had not yet been exposed to. He was my first peek into how a young men should carry themselves, with couth and an effortless coolness. Still, it was for those reasons that I felt like he was way out of my league (like I said, confidence issues).

Thanks be to God for the glow up that he allowed me to undergo, because this was the change I needed, inside and out, to finally have the confidence to tell him how I felt. As mentioned, it had been on my heart for a while to go for it, but it wasn’t until a random night while out with a co-worker that I decided to go through with it. So I texted him. 

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He was sending all the right signals: no one word responses, proper usage of emojis, returning my jokes, etc. From this reasoning, my hopes were high and I was prepared for the best possible outcome. That’s when I let him know.

Have an exit route:  About an hour into our exchange, there was no turning back, it was out there in the open that I was his secret admirer. In his seeming disbelief, he asked, “Why didn't you say something sooner?” That’s when I informed him of how I felt that he was out of reach or was just too busy to entertain lil ol’ me. At this point, the terror began to set in as I waited for his response to my claim. He soon informed me that he too had “always wondered about me” and that I, “always seemed like I had a lot to say” and that he, “likes to know people with a lot to say.”

Now, you all just read that, right? Wouldn’t you think that our conversation was headed towards a fairy tale ending? Well, I did. But all of that changed the next morning.

Be prepared for the best… and worst: After reading that message, I offered that we should try to get to know one another better if that was cool with him (remember I said commit). Heart open, guard down, that’s when he dropped the bomb.

Note: whenever someone tells you that they want to be “1,000,000% clear with you” brace yourself for impact, honey. He went on to tell me that he was, in fact, talking to another young woman (who I'm sure is just splendid 🙃) and if I expected to be “the only one” he couldn’t promise me that.

First off, many salutes to him for the honesty and openness because most guys would have taken this situation and ran with it! Which speaks to how great of a young man he is. But still, ouch. To finally learn that your crush is potentially off the market was heartbreaking at first and it took me a while to pick my pride and face from off the ground. But once I did, I was able to tell him that we should keep our lines open to one another, but I wanted to respect what he was working on. (I’m such a great person)

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Let me be clear: taking this step of faith is not for the faint at heart. This isn't to scare you, it to encourage you to guard your heart for each possible outcome before taking the plunge. Still, speaking from experience, shooting your shot is/can be an exhilarating experience! There’s something about facing your fears straight on that will leave you feeling braver and more victorious, even if you don’t come out with your dream man/woman in the end.

It’s the second week of 2017 and I propose that you shoot your shot. Any shot, as long as it's calculated. It doesn’t have to be your crush, it can be starting a blog, submitting your book idea to a publisher, or going back to the gym after a year-long hiatus. Whatever it is, just try. And I promise you, your stronger, braver, happier, future self will thank you for it.

Have you shot your shot before? Do you want to? Let me know in the comments below how you plan on shooting your shot this year! I’d love to hear.

Peace, peace, peace,

Aley Arion 

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